An exaltation of orchards

Something’s stirring. It’s not yet a cacophany, but louder than a murmuration. Less regular than time or tide but more common than a blue moon. Quieter than an earthquake but more significant than a tremor. Is the country beginning to fall in love with its orchards once again?

Agroforestry seems to be in the news. Seven farms in Devon are participating in extended silvopastoral trials, some of which include fruit trees. Last autumn tree nurseries were selling their stock like hot cakes. This coming winter it looks like we’ll be planting over a thousand fruit trees in new orchards, mostly in Gloucestershire and Oxfordshire, a few further afield in Norfolk and Suffolk.

Collective nouns

An orchard is, of course, the collective noun for fruit trees - for 5 or more fruit trees, to be precise. Compared to the exuberant extravagance of the collective nouns for birds - a chime of wrens, for example - “an orchard of fruit trees” hardly makes the pulse race, but we are where we are. What, however, is the collective noun for groups of orchards? There isn’t one, so today we're starting the search to find the collective noun for orchards. As with birds, it should reflect in some way the quality of orchards, as a descent of woodpeckers describes their habit of creeping down tree trunks as they gobble up invertebrates, a murmuration of starlings recalls the background hum of 10,000 pairs of wings and a bellowing of bullfinches is a comment on their thick necks.

An exaltation of orchards?

As a starter for ten, we propose an exaltation of orchards. It's not correct and must be bettered, not least because exaltation belongs to skylarks (a comment on their joyful, exuberant song), but it does at least reflect how we feel about orchards and their life-affirming qualities. Or a trumpeting of orchards? Again, it’s not right; although the qualities of orchards need to be broadcast far and wide and loudly, orchards are, in essence, restful and peaceful places. Someone out there will stumble across the right word.

{As an aside, we also propose that the collective noun for collective nouns is a muddle. Certainly as far as birds are concerned, there are a lot of duplicates … is it a mob of crows or a murder of crows? Geese are a skein when in flight, but also a wedge or a nide, are a gaggle when on land, and a plump when on water. We intend to avoid such complexity when selecting the collective noun for orchards … it should apply to orchards large or small, new or old, kempt or unkempt; one word to portray all orchards, at home and abroad.}

To help get your creative juices flowing, here are some collective nouns for birds … and a glance though this list is a reminder, if it was needed, that many of these birds are now an increasingly rare sight in our countryside and much in need of the welcoming habitat that traditional orchards provide.

An orchestra of avocets, a bellowing of bullfinches, a mural of buntings, a wake of buzzards, a confusion of chiffchaffs, a chattering of choughs, a commotion of coots, a murder (or mob) of crows, an asylum of cuckoos, a curfew of curlews, an aerie of eagles, a quilt of eiders, a trembling of finches (also, a charm of finches or a trimming of finches), a swatting of flycatchers, a prayer of godwits, a charm of goldfinches, a water dance of grebes, a circlage of house martins, a scold of jays, a crown of kingfishers, a deceit of lapwings (seems somewhat harsh), a parcel of linnets, a mischief of magpies, a cast of merlins, a booby of nuthatches, a parliament of owls (also, a wisdom of owls), an invisibleness of ptarmigans, a conspiracy of ravens (do ravens really look like they're up to no good?), a worm of robins (hmmm … is this correct??), a parliament of rooks, an exultation of skylarks, a wisp of snipe, a quarrel of sparrows, a murmuration of starlings, a kettle of swallows, a committee of terns, a hermitage of thrushes, a banditry of titmice, a pitying of turtledoves, a volery of wagtails, a museum of waxwings, a fall of woodcock, a descent of woodpeckers, a chime of wrens.

If you’re looking to while away some time, we obtained this list from Chloe Rhodes’ book, An Unkindness of Ravens.